First 2 Lines (Not important)

The imposing performance graduates with my highlight. 

Okay?

January 6, 2011

Healthy baby 👧

She doesn't look anything like me. I want to cry.

It's stressful but nothing I can't handle. The baby is definitely not the problem here...

I feel a little too overwhelmed with the daddy's side of the family. Uptight parents who definitely think that I have other motives with their family fortune? Yeesh. I'm not that kind of person.

I always get stressed around them. I can't relax with their haunting presence. Every move you make is like CCTV worthy of speculating during the backroom playback. I have developed from mild anxiety to major anxiety attacks. There is no way that I'm staying under the same roof as them. It's not healthy to always have to be on your toes all the time or feel like you always have to watch my back.

But, I'm always thankful for the financial support. I can't imagine where I would be now if it weren't for their love for the child or undying 'generosity'.

Getting Back to Drawing

I've been drawing since I could remember. Maybe I was pushed by a family of Art Nazis. I never really had a problem with getting good grades/passing grades for Art Plates, Art Projects and sucking up to the art teacher ;) (They knew about my background and suddenly everything I make is somehow linked to the Mother ship)

I wished that it was some sort of joke but this is really how I was programmed. My environment was a factor. Hereditary? Definitely Bragging.

Way back in my early elementary years, I never really embraced the talent since all I did was play, not study, getting busy with unsupervised childhood, and plainly just wandering around the neighborhood as much to my surprise that I never got kidnapped. I don't know... I only had vague memories about how I started receiving great comments about my doodles, got higher /perfect grades for plates and getting trophies and medals from my grandmother's summer art workshop exhibitions.

I rarely brought complete art materials in school. I remembered this whole school year, my art teacher gives an extra 20 points for those who brought their complete stuff and I didn't even care. Even during clearance signing, I always lack a lot of plates in my compilation and had to do a last minute drawing marathon :))

I loved reading my grandmother's Art Book Collection. Well, not really reading but I loved staring at all the pictures of beautiful and realistic paintings and sketches made by the artists. She had Degas, Rembrandt, Picasso, Monet, Van Gogh etc.. 

If I was going to appreciate art, then why stop at paintings?

 I'm also a great fan of classical ballet and classical music (other people find it BORING but screw you) It helps calm and heal my deteriorating brain from all the worthless and countless hours of watching TV and staring at the computer screen, or look at boring people's pictures on social media. Plants dig the Mozarts and the Bachs. Surgeons save lives with these geniuses rockin' the white wigs and awesome beethoven hair. It's a good genre to listen to whenever I feel like I want my strokes (painting/sketching) to be as effortless as possible. 

I swear these posts I make are just stupid journal entries and they're not as comforting to read back to after a few years. It's disappointingly boring.